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The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander

From Preschool to High School—How Parents and Teachers Can Help Break the Cycle

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1 of 1 copy available
1 of 1 copy available

It's the deadliest combination going: bullies who terrorize, bullied kids who are afraid to tell, bystanders who watch, and adults who see the incidents as a normal part of childhood. All it takes to understand that this is a recipe for tragedy is a glance at headlines across the country. In this updated edition of The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander, which includes a new section on cyberbullying, one of the world's most trusted parenting educators gives parents, caregivers, educators—and most of all, kids—the tools to break the cycle of violence.

Drawing on her decades of work with troubled youth, and her wide experience in the areas of conflict resolution and reconciliatory justice, Barbara Coloroso explains:

  • The three kinds of bullying, and the differences between boy and girl bullies
  • Four abilities that protect your child from succumbing to bullying
  • Seven steps to take if your child is a bully
  • How to help the bullied child heal and how to effectively discipline the bully
  • How to evaluate a school's antibullying policy
  • And much more
  • This compassionate and practical guide has become the groundbreaking reference on the subject of bullying.

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    • Reviews

      • Publisher's Weekly

        December 16, 2002
        This is an extremely helpful book that both parents and teachers can use to deal with bullying, an aspect of school that the author feels "is a life-and-death issue that we ignore at our children's peril." Staring with a bottom-line assumption that "bullying is a learned behavior," Coloroso (Parenting Through Crisis) wonderfully explains not only the ways that the bully, the bullied and the bystander are "three characters in a tragic play" but also how "the scripts can be rewritten, new roles created, the plot changed." For each of the three "characters," she breaks down the behavior that defines each role, analyzes the specific ways that each character can have their behaviors changed for the better, and suggests a range of methods that parents and educators can use to identify bullying behavior and deal with it effectively. The book also provides excellent insights into behaviors related to but not always recognized as bullying, such as cliques, hazing, taunting and sexual bullying. And while there have been numerous books about bullies, this volume is perhaps best for its sections on the "bystander," the person whose behavior is too often overlooked or excused. Coloroso's emphasis on aikido-related defensive skills do not sufficiently address the issue of what a child is to do when physical force is necessary to stop a bully, but overall this is an important look at the ways that bullied children can affirm their dignity and self-worth.

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    Languages

    • English

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